Testimony – God Restores a Broken Marriage

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One of the more frequent type of emails we have received over the years since we have been online is from married couples, where one of the spouses has left the other one for another partner. The one spouse who has been left behind then starts praying to God to bring their spouse back home.

The pain adultery causes in a marriage relationship is extreme and traumatic, as a broken heart is one of the worst kinds of pain you can go through. For those of you who have been on the receiving end of adultery, you know exactly what I am talking about. You feel like your whole world has been shattered and that you will never be able to trust your spouse again, even though you are asking God to bring your mate back to you as you cannot stand the pain of that broken heart.

For those of you who are still praying to the Lord for the restoration of your marriage, below is a powerful testimony we have just received from a woman by the name of Crystal. Crystal had what she thought was the perfect marriage when all of a sudden her husband tells her one day he wants out of the marriage, as he had been having an affair with a woman online.

As you will see when reviewing her testimony below, Crystal was determined she was not going to lose her good marriage over something like this, so she stormed the throne of God asking Him to move to bring her husband back. Here is her word-for-word testimony, and then I will point out a few key things she did to get God to move on this extreme situation.

My name is Crystal and I’m here to let you know that with man it may seem impossible……but with Almighty God…..NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE…

I made a promise to God and to myself that WHEN he restored my marriage, I would testify and tell the world….I would share EVERY single detail no matter how shameful and embarrassing it would be, in the hope and knowledge that I would someday be able to bring some kind of hope for a hurting wife or husband who would’ve been going through what I once was.

I’ll try to be as brief as possible but I really don’t want to leave any detail out….no matter how small, because it may be the very thing God wants to use to inspire and encourage a stander or prodigal spouse.

I don’t want to apportion blame too much here but suffice it to say we had some in-law issues which contributed greatly to our demise….but that is another story and I want to concentrate on how God showed up and showed off in the mist of my situation. Today is March 16th 2011…. My husband of 1 year and 5 months left me on November 30th, 2010… .BUT…. all thanks and all praise be to Almighty God, he is now back home and we are rebuilding a marriage that from all counts and to the naked eye in the natural realm was dead.

As far as I could see we were the perfect couple……went out together…….stayed home together……laughed, joked……..we were like two peas in a pod……of course we had our regular marital problems….no marriage is perfect……..in addition to the above we also….. argued and sometimes told each other some harsh words…….LIKE EVERY OTHER COUPLE……it isn’t right but it happens…..

In spite of all this , I believed he loved me just as much as I loved him……you could imagine my surprise and heart break when one day after a short disagreement……and I mean short….lasting no more that a few minutes…..my beloved husband packed his clothes and walked out of my life…….

All this happened on Nov 30th 2010…..I held off from calling him because I was still upset and I figured I didn’t do him any harm…..he was the one that stepped out in our marriage and on our marriage…..ours wasn’t a physical stepping as in outside sex….it was an on-going 5 month relationship on the internet, with someone he had been previously involved with.

The days went by and he didn’t call so on December 5th 2010….I called him…..he refused to take my calls so I texted him only to be told that he wasn’t interested in me and I should go on with my life….that I should never call or text him again……..that was like a dagger through my heart……I felt as though someone had literally ran a knife straight through my stomach and was twisting it repeatedly…..but that isn’t the worse yet…..

I persisted in calling him that same day and eventually he picked up the phone…he was as cold as ice……I felt frightened even listening to him……he told me….I NEVER LOVED YOU……I AM SORRY WE GOT MARRIED…..I FELT TRAPPED IN THIS MARRIAGE…..I DON’T LOVE YOU LIKE A MAN SHOULD LOVE A WOMAN…..THE FEELINGS I HAVE FOR YOU IS THAT OF A “GOOD” FRIEND……I DON’T WANT TO BE WITH YOU AND YOU SHOULD GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE…..I’M
NOT COMING BACK…….

I have never felt pain like I did then in my entire life……..it is amazing when you are down on luck how quickly you remember that GOD does exists.

I was a regular church goer and I tithed but I still didn’t have that personal relationship with God…..well God has a way of getting our attention in ways unimaginable….and he got mine.

I cried DAILY AND HOURLY……I felt all hope was gone….I mean how do you get someone to love you again when that person is saying I never loved you at all…..YOU CANT….BUT GOD CAN……

I had built my life around my husband and now he was gone……I felt like I lost the better part of me…..I couldn’t eat….I couldn’t eat ….I didn’t want to socialize and I forced myself to go to work…..but God had a plan…….even though all seemed lost……God was turning my situation around even as I was hurting…..what the devil meant for evil God was turning around for good.

I enlisted the help of three persons…….a Prophetess, an Apostle, and a church Pastor…..these were all spiritual people I knew……and strong men and women of God……I knew I wasn’t strong in my spirit and my faith was way less than even that of a mustard seed.

I still cried every day but I also engaged in some radical and spiritual warfare for my husband…..I spoke the word of God over my marriage EVERYDAY and I prayed hedges of thorns around my husband EVERYDAY…..I pleaded the blood of Jesus over him and claimed my marriage in the name of Jesus.

Remember I wasn’t rooted in God so my prayers wasn’t as flowing as other people but everyday I gain more and more strength and my faith began to soar…..I prayed that God would soften my husband’s heart and remind him of the love we once shared……I asked God to send Godly people in his life to speak to him even when I couldn’t and God heard me….

I think I either bought or borrowed every book on marriage…warfare….prayer…you name it ….every website I could think of…….. And I just wrapped my husband up and prayed what ever pray I could even verbatim from some of those same books…….I became like a one man army…..

At times the devil whispered in my ears and unbelief and doubt settled in….I would call my prayer warriors for encouragement and go to God crying and in a few hours would be right as rain and ready again to go up against the gates of hell for my boo. To make a long story short……Sunday January 16th 2011….I got a text from my husband….who accidently had AGAIN on the 14th January 2011…..told me he felt the same way and I should go on with my life.

He said he wanted to talk and wanted to know if he could come by the house…he wanted to know if I could forgive him for what he did and for us to try again at our
marriage…

I had released my husband and my marriage to God and I knew God was going to do something…. but I thought it would be perhaps a Hi hello…how are you….or perhaps a few weeks down the line he might drop in a call or something……….I had no idea that MY GOD was bringing my husband home that day….that instant…

He told me that after he spoke to me on Thursday….he went to God himself and talked to him and asked him to speak and show him what he should do……..he said from the time he said that everything just went crazy…..everything he saw reminded him of me….. when he went to sleep his dreams were constant replays of our life together….. he started thinking about stuff that happened before and after our marriage that were nothing short of miraculous…..

In short…..God was speaking to him all along but he was too proud to just walk back and admit that he was wrong but he wanted to so much….. He wanted to give our marriage a chance and he loved me and wanted to be with ME.

I give all the thanks and praise to God for what he did……it doesn’t matter what your situation looks like….it doesn’t matter how impossible and dead it seems……it doesn’t matter what your husband or wife is planning……..we plan but God is also planning and he works EVERYTHING out together for those that love the LORD..

DO NOT GIVE UP….THE DEVIL AND EVEN YOUR OWN MIND IS GOING TO TRY TO TELL YOU TO MOVE ON…LEAVE HIM/HER ALONE…HE/SHE DOESN’T WANT YOU…..THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO…..THERE IS NO ONE THAT CAN HELP YOU NOW…..DO NOT LISTEN……even in your tears….cry out to God….when you don’t know what to say…..just say JESUS….nothing more……tears is a language God understands and he is going to work it out…..

This isn’t every single detail of what happened there are parts missing…but my short journey has been nothing but incredible and miraculous…but I want you to know that with God ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE…

Be encouraged

Notice several key things Crystal did to get God to move on her behalf.

1.  The first thing she did was to fully surrender the entire matter into God’s hand. Notice she said she had faith less than the size of a mustard seed when she first started to approach the Lord for His help.

As we have showed you in our article titled, “Bible Verses on Faith,” the Bible tells us that faith the size of a mustard seed will move mountains. This means that you do not have to have large amounts of faith with the Lord to get the show going with Him. God will take whatever level of faith you are operating at with Him and then move to help you out with your current situation as long as you are directly seeking after His help and are willing to fully surrender the entire matter into His hands.

2.  The next thing she did right was to enlist the aid of three powerful prayer warriors to help her with her prayers to the Lord. This is what is called the prayer of agreement. We already have an article on how powerful of a strategy this is with the Lord. The title of this article is, “Prayer Secret #6 – The Prayer of Agreement.”

3.  Also notice she went into a very heavy seeking mode by searching out every good book she could find on marriage, prayer, and spiritual warfare. The Bible says to “seek” and then you will find what you are looking for. And this woman went into a very heavy seeking mode. I believe when God sees this kind of intense seeking activity, He is really moved, and sometimes that is what will get Him to move to answer the prayer.

4.  Another thing she did when she went on the offensive was to plead the blood of Jesus around the situation. If you have a spouse that has left you for another person, it would be our recommendation to plead the blood of Jesus around them, and then plead the blood of Jesus against any demons who are trying to get in the middle of this, along with pleading the blood of Jesus directly against the person they are having the affair with.

All in all, as you read her incredible testimony, the thing that stands out is her fierce determination that she was not going to let her marriage go, and that she would take a hold of God and keep praying to Him until He brought her husband back home to her.

We want to personally thank Crystal for allowing us to release her testimony on our site, as it will help show others that God can move to restore broken marriages, no matter how hopeless things may look in the natural.

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  1. I blocked my prodigal ex-husband from my phone yesterday. It was a heart-wrenching decision that I’m still struggling with. I prayed for a couple of weeks about it, took Holy Communion over it, prayed in the spirit, and asked God for wisdom. I really felt led to put an end to his nonsense and block him.

    He left me 7 years ago for another woman, who ended up dumping him a couple of years ago. I had prayed the hedge of thorns prayer and stood on God’s Word and proclaimed the demise of that relationship, but it took that long for it to come to an end. I thought he would come running back, and he did make a false start, but his heart was still hardened towards me. He still blames me for everything, even blames me for that adulteress dumping him. The cheating spouses always say the same things because the devil knows no new tricks.

    This past Thanksgiving when he came to visit the kids (he lives a couple of hundred miles away), I thought there was a huge breakthrough with him. His heart seemed softened, and he wanted to spend time with me. I didn’t pressure him or pursue; I just followed his lead. We had a nice holiday, but when he returned for Christmas, it was a different story. He was running around with a married woman- a classmate he had reconnected with thanks to faceboook- and lying to me about it. I stayed quiet and poured my heart and tears out to God. We did end up spending some time together, but he spent most of his time texting or facebooking on his phone and saying things to hurt my feelings, and there was zero affection.

    After Christmas, when he went back to where he lives, we have stayed in touch, but most of our phone/text conversations only served to torment me. He was always going on about all this new stuff he was buying for his apartment, which to me meant he had no intention of us ever being together. He would contact me only when it was convenient for him, and he would talk about the women he worked out with. He was texting a married woman he works out with (why does marriage mean NOTHING anymore?), and also a couple of 20-something year olds he works with. He would even tell me about going out on the town with those 20-something year olds (He is 41). He would be very sweet sometimes and tell me he missed me, so it kept me in a constant state of confusion and torment. It became intolerable to the point that I didnt want to hear from him anymore, so last night I sent him an email, then blocked his number. I’m sure he is going to be very angry.

    I don’t know if I made the right decision or not. Part of me feels like I gave up, but part of me feels at peace because I’m no longer his doormat or the recipient of his emotional abuse. I will continue to pray for God to touch his heart, and will cast all my cares on Him and rest in knowing that it’s all in God’s hands and that He’ll work it all out for my good.

    I’ve been praying for all the marriages here. Proclaiming your rights to a restored marriage and that the mountain of adultery will be removed and cast into the sea forever. It’s time for us to take back everything the enemy has stolen. He has been caught and must now repay at least 7x what he has stolen from us!

  2. Robert,

    I love those little signs!

    I do honestly believe God can do anything. All things are possible, even reconciliation and a full restoration of marriage, with God.

    When I break it down, there are a couple of issues of mine that I have to work on with myself. One is my own anger & bitterness towards what occurred. Not just the infidelity, but the character assassination and lies since. After having been failed by my wife, some family and even my own children to some extents, I have great difficulty trusting other people in all areas of my life. I know that’s not good & I’m working on it. The lying & dishonesty make it difficult because it’s still happening. I really don’t want to be around a person like that and a small part of me is afraid of being failed again.

    I would love to experience reconciliation because I know a Godly restoration makes all things many times better and stronger than it ever was before… I want nothing more than that. Our sons feel the same way. Everything I’ve read – others’ testimonies and some of my own experiences of restoration in life assure me of that. It’s such a beautiful thing!!

    Martette,

    Thank you for sharing that!! 🙂

    And thank you, Crystal, for sharing THAT!!!

  3. Ohhh i love this, I just send it to my pastor!! And Sonnette so glad that you did proceed to councilling, and God does want you do that, here is what I receive today in my devotional
    Divorce and Adultery

    Matthew 5:31-32

    John Calvin reminds us that “the bond of marriage is too sacred to be dissolved at the will, or rather at the licentious pleasure, of men.” Many issues can drive spouses to despair and contemplate an unbiblical divorce. That is why we must seek help for our marital troubles at the first sign of trouble. If you need counseling, make an appointment with your pastor today. If you know of another couple who is having problems, encourage them to seek counseling as well.

    For further study:

    Malachi 2:10-16

  4. Got sum great news now guyz! 🙂 – I contacted a church about marriage councilling on Wednesday this week and the lady I spoke to said that she would get a Pastor to get back to me. I neva expected sum1 2 get back to me in fact to be honest I gave up on councilling as I thought that mayb it wud onli b gud to go once my husband wants to reconcile…

    I have been praying for God to send us a Godly couple to council us, who have been through what we have been thru & come out of the experience victoriously. Well I got a call from a Pastor today and we chatted for a while, he said that he personally would not council us because he has only been married for 2 yrs but there are two specific couples who have been divorced & remarried that he thinks would be good to council us – he told me that there are numerous couples in the church who have had various issues for cause of breakdown in their marriage like substance abuse, infidelity, financial reasons and that they are now a living testimoni of God’s restoration power. He spoke alot about the things we have discussed & believe in on this site.

    I felt so much joy just speaking to him – he was speaking our language guyz! I told him I wasnt sure if its the right time for us to get councilling & he said – your husband needs to be confronted with this – he needs to know the truth – what he said made sense. He will be getting back to me sometime nxt week as he wants to speak to these couples to ascertain who would be the best to council my husband and I.

    Please cover this in your prayers guyz!!! that God send the right Godly couple to council us and that my husband agrees to going & that God will prepare his heart in advance for the councilling!
    God bless u all! all my luv!

  5. Robert, keep your vigilance up!!!!
    But rejoice!! Members of the body of Christ are starting to confirm!!!! ALL GLORY TO OUR HOLY GOD,
    This happen to me on tuesday, remember that my brother had the meeting with the doctors. I had decided to fast ( which I really hate) and was just wondering on how, how would God be ale to move, how would my little faith be able to do anything! I gave Him what I could, but just felt so alone and ready for reality, when I went to check my mailbox, and saw a letter for me. When I opened it, it came with the usual stuff, but there was a post-it attach to it. This woman from GFA (gospel for asia) just left me a little note, letting me know that it was her privilege to pray for my brother, my increase in faith and my parents. I had send my prayer request in July. I kept receiving their mail, but never a note or something the like, until tuesday, on the day that my brother had his evaluation, when I needed to step up in major faith. She had no way of knowing when the letter would arrive, it was send by post. I don’t even know her! Yet the little note arrive when I needed it most. Robert, I don’t think this a coincidence, but keep praying and seeking our Lord’s will. We must keep praying in Agreement and Unity, because just as the Lord is working the enemy will try desperate and stronger attacks, but who can against us when we have brothers and sisters the most AMAZING and INCREDIBLE and POWERFUL LIVING GOD backing our back. Most Exalted One, this is Your Fight, Your Word and Arm will prevail Against Anything and Anyone, may we be Your vessel, as clay in Your Hand, may we be molded to Your desire and Utility in this coming storm, and like eagles enter the storm without fear but rejoicing For Your Winds will guide us!

  6. I would love to tell you all our LOVE STORY!!! There is someone else who is wanting to hear our testimony as well. So once I get it all wrote out I will share it with you all!! We promised God we would not keep quiet about what he has done for us !! God Bless!!

  7. Martette,

    It’s wonderful to hear from you again… Thank you for your encouragement – it is music to our ears! I pray someday, you will be able to share your story of how God reunited both of you.

    You never know who’s life God is waiting to change THROUGH YOU and the blessing He’s created in your life!

  8. Trust me !! NEVER GIVE UP!!! My husband and I were divorced for 18 years as I said before. We both had gotten married to another person. We can not even begin to tell you how we got back together after all those years. Our children are grown and now we get to enjoy being grandparents together. Who would ever had thought? Certainly not us!! It was truelly a miracle !!! Never give up hope!! Now it’s like we had never been apart!!! God bless you all!!!

  9. Barry,

    So are you’re saying God can’t reconcile your marriage, or you’re at peace with not reconciling it? I just want to make sure you’re not letting the devil tell you it’s too late. Did you see the website Crystal posted about that couple who were divorced for 7 years? As far as the other Pastor, if he thinks it’s “unusual” then tell him to pray asking for God to reveal the truth as to what has been going on. But I would attend it anyway – that’s your child. Not sure why she didn’t attend the first one but I don’t think it’s really important. Just make sure you don’t fall into the trap I feel she may be setting you up for. Even if you’re in the right, you may end up looking like the bad guy. Not exactly sure what that means – but be on your guard and plead the blood of Jesus over you and the situation.

    Everyone else,

    Shortly after New Year’s, I asked God to show me a specific sign that He heard my prayer and was going to answer it in the way I had hoped He would. The sign was for a pigeon to land on my window sill. And guess what? I never got the sign.

    I prayed intensely yesterday night, fell asleep thanking God. Woke up this morning, prayed again – super intense!

    As soon as I said “Amen,” I heard something outside the window. When I lifted up the shade, there were 3 birds (not pigeons) looking at me, then one by one, they flew away. I put the shade down, and thanked God in tears for His sign. During my praise, I heard something else by the window – a different bird, looking at me, and then flew away.

    I asked God for 1, he sent me 4 – what a God of abundance!

    Now, I haven’t seen any real change in my wife, but OUR prayers are working… PLEASE KEEP PRAYING, DON’T LET UP!

    Then, one of my prayer warriors called me saying they felt down and under attack. Well, God and I fixed that up right away! My mother called to tell me her situation at work that we prayed over was turned around – praise God!

    Later in the day, I started to feel under attack. I immediately broke out in violent prayer (think of the language in the Psalm I quoted yesterday) and look what happens…

    Sendy comes to the rescue with her beautifully Spirit-inspired prayer! It made me cry! (But then lately, most things make me cry 😉

    But it was sooo beautifully written, it didn’t even give the enemy a chance to plant a stronghold in my mind or heart.

    Our prayers have momentum, they’re working, they’re creating results, they’re manifesting signs and wonders…

    Keep pressing forth as I am in agreement with all of you too! God is here… RIGHT NOW.

  10. She remarried so there is little to no hope or expectation of a reconciliation. The primary issue I’m forced to deal with now is her hatred & badmouthing to our sons (10 & 7) & other family. Lies & projecting of guilt. Thankfully the boys know better. The latest is her is having our 7 year old baptized this weekend. Not such a bad thing. But he was already baptized with me at our old church last month. Her reasoning? Because she didn’t see it. So she’s inviting all kinds of family out to her church. I’ve been in discussion with that particular pastor & I plan on being there… He just described it as unusual.

  11. Sonnette…..Can I call you Sonn:) or Nette…LOL…Ok yeah the Nette is ridiculous LOL…
    You are so special to me you dont even know it:)….I am so proud of you girl and I love you to bits (big hugs and kisses)….
    Dont you ever feel ashamed of anything you post on this forum….no one here is judging you hun…not me not Robert not Sendy,Barry,Christine no one….
    You have no idea how your posts has helped us even in our own struggle….your strength is so rare and is to be admired I myself dont know how I would’ve made it…..
    If you’re ashamed about the sex thing dont be…I myself did that same thing just under slightly different circumstances but sex is sex nevertheless.
    I know God is going to make that change in your husband dont you worry…easier said than done I know but we are all here for u untill he comes to his senses and even after he comes….
    I wish we could all on this forum go to lunch some time LOLOLOL….ROB you pick the place…SEndy you buy the milkshakes…..and BArry…you pay for the treats……orange coconut for me LOL

  12. Robert,

    Thanks for ur posts on the material & sites, music to listen to etc & every1 else – i have lots to do to keep myself occupied in Gods word! & lots of meditating to do – esp those verses on God working speedily in our situations.

    U r sooo rit about the conversations we hav as he does bring up the other women & how she has made him feel loved etc. wat she bought him – how she makes him feel – & u know wat – its hurts! so i have decided not to allow that subject to come up because u r soooo rit I have always ended up the loser in those conversations!

    Matthew 7:6 – “Don’t give what is holy to dogs or throw your pearls to pigs. Otherwise, they will trample them and then tear you to pieces.” U know Rbert the last time my husband and i were intimate.. the fact is – i actuali felt used. so i have decided that until we reconcile it will be purely platonic. u rit he doesnt appreciate it.

    Where the councilling is concerned Im not too sure. I think he may have agreed to it because of presure, maybe guilt, to keep me quiet so he can go again… who knows but I feel i shud not reali pursue it until he reali wants to reconcile – it may be a waste…

    Well thats it 4 me. Yesterday & today was truly days of enlightenment 4 me!
    I feel ready to pick up my weapons & stand in my authority to fight this fight as i know God is on my side – i can see him working in mysterious ways!

    God bless u all!! u hav all been such a blessing to me – i am exactly where im supposed to be.

  13. Crystal

    Thank you for being so brutally honest with me even tho u knew it wud hurt me. The funny thing is that wat u were saying I felt in my heart & i believe the Holy Spirit was ministering the exact same you telling me thing is – I just didnt know how to assimilate it on that terrible nit.

    My husband just phoned me now – normally I phone him every morning when I get to work & also to make sure he is coming home which I did not do – I did not phone him this morning – 1st thing he says was why havent i phoned him he hasnt heard from me….. he sounded a very leeeeeetle bit sore I didnt phone him he mustv been waiting for my call to tell me his not coming home 2nit again as he has to re-rig the sound. I told him – fine. I know alredi even if i protest he wil go ahead & do as he wants & get angry with me for insisting he cums home.

    U know Crystal u sed my husband is a user, abuser & a cheat & that was what I was feeling! it was what i was realising – I knew i had to start being honest with myself – u putting it into words has helped me see the reality of the situation. & that is exactly wat i was doing make the wrongs rit – well im gona stop doing that Crystal – i have been trying to make up for the wrong i was doing but the thing is it has not been reciprocated – u rit – even wat wasnt my fault.

    & yes i have decided not to beg him to stay anymor or to guilt him into staying – i have made that decision. I thank the Lord for some1 like u Crystal coming into my life who has been thru this! Crystal I am letting go & letting God!! & i feel such peace about that if u read my post to Sendy u wil see how God has been so present in my life today! 🙂 its almost like a new beginning.

    I have decided to go to the services from Fri nit til Sun when it wil finish I told my husband i wud b there – he tells me to not cause any trouble – I told him the only reason Im going is because every1 at work has been encouraging me to go – his seen all my colleagues there & because i want to be in the Gods presence. Im taking my daughter and i am going to give her a firm warning not to go to the other women. Im not going near her either & iv decided to stay as much away from my husband as i can as i know my daugher wil wnt to go to her daddy.

    I feel strengthend again & wil continue praying for my husband – I know God is with me! Thank you for those words – thats exactly wat i am going to do – giv my husband ova to God – i know God wil do the work & create the change in him. Like Barry sed he is in a fog – he cannot see wat his actions is doing but i trust God to show him the reality of his actions. I felt so ashamed of my last post & bearing it all – but it was a good move – i needed to not only b honest with myself but with u too so i cud c the reality of my situation.

    Thank you for the encourage & God bless all of u! God is gona work mightily! – soon our posts wil b testimonies!!

  14. Barry

    thank you for your words of encouragement & prayers it has really lifted me up today reading your post. I am trusting & believing that God will bring my husband to that place he brought you – to his senses! To complete salvation!

    I’m praying that the blinkers & blinders will fall off my husbands eyes. That the hedge of thorns im praying around him will allow nothing thru but God’s word as Gods word is sharper than any two edged sword!

    I’m starting to slowly come to a place where I’m realizing God loves me & cares for me & cares for what Im going thru and he is rit here with me!

  15. Sendy I read ur post again… im not done with you – you said something very profound. These were your words to me: “Ask Him to show you His perspective on your circumstances (for His ways are not our ways and He will give us what we need)” Well can I tell you something God has already shown me his perspective and given me what I need this morning as soon as I got to work! im excited! Well what happend was I decided to fast & pray today – then i searched Fasting & Praying on this site but instead I got to a this page on this site called: Trials and Tribulations – The Testing of Your Faith. I started reading it: its about why Christians saved by the blood go thru trials & tribulations. – Very interesting reading & a very long article – im stil busy reading it. every1 should read it – just search Trials & Tribulations – The Testing of ur Faith.

    Anyway a colleague – young saved guy comes & sits nxt to me & asks me “what you doing Sonnette?” so I tell him: “Im just reading this article on why even us Christians saved by the blood goes thru trials & tribulations” well this guy knows nothing in fact none of my colleagues know what im going thru…He says to me: “Sonnette funny because this morning i was watching a sermon by Grassroots Angus Buchan – well Angus Buchan is a South African farmer & popular preacher of Gods word. he says “the sermon was about snow & that where he farms he gets snow every couple of years & it spoils his crops – the crop is inferior. But he also said that even tho this happens the snow does something else – snow rejuvenates the soil & kills any insects & germs in the snow & then the next year you get a very very good bumper crop!”

    Wow! isnt God good 🙂 God has shown me his perspective in my circumstances! God is there – he is working in our situations I think we just have to learn to see the signs 🙂 I also remember now that when I 1st found out about my husbands adultery, that night i cudnt sleep i was just praying – God showed me a wound on a leg a pussy sore then he showed me this pussy sore oozing now & that, that was where I was, then he showed me the pussy sore scar after it healed & then the scar completely healed & blemish free. God showed me that the sore was starting to ooze when I found out about the adultery.

    Also I read ur url the bibleriches.org website – very interesting – will look at it more indepth when I get home & im gona download the Chris Tomlin – I lift my hands mp3 onto my cellphone to listen to whenever i need to 🙂 God has used me in ur life & u have been used in my life Sendy 🙂 God is sooooo awesum I am soooo overwhelmed! He is rit here with me in this storm!

  16. SENDY!!!!

    Praise be to the Lord God!! We serve an awesum miracle working, Living God! Right now I just want to praise God!! – I feel soooooo blessed to have been a blessing!! That is absolutely wonderful news about your brother I am soooo hapi & excited I actuali started crying here at my place of work!!!

    Sendy when I was 18yrs old my parents got divorced, i dont think they eva reali loved each other & i think they got married for all the wrong reasons… They have been divorced now for a couple of yrs.
    I have 2 younger unsaved brothers and I have always prayed off & on for their salvation, I live in a different city to them & dont see them often but ur account of your situation with your brother tells me that i need to continue praying for my brothers & family’s salvation & my mum & dad – its only myself & my eldest sister who is saved. I also lost my other younger brother to TB in January 2011 but praise God I & my sister encouraged him & he did give his heart to Jesus before he died.

    Sendy thank & thank you for your words of encouragement, I havent been attending church altho I have kept my relationship with Jesus, my husband & I moved to a different town a couple yrs ago & visited many church here but neva settled on 1 – I have decided that I am going to start attending church regularly with my 5yr old daughter again & she needs to attend sunday school.

    I am soooo excited about what God is doing in your brothers life!! wow God is soooo good!

  17. Someone just reminded me of a story I shared with them – they felt so inspired by it, they said I should share it with everyone else too. So here goes…

    Many years ago, I went on a vacation with my family and girlfriend (of course, before I even knew my wife). My girlfriend and I were having fun swimming on the beach. But at one point, we were a little too far out from the shore and got pulled down by an undercurrent. I remember reaching out to my girlfriend and trying to pull her towards the shore, since I was closer than she was. Every time I would get pulled under water, I would try to push her up and forward so she would be closer to the beach. But our feet weren’t touching the ground and it was physically exhausting. I could feel my lungs filling up with water every time I went down – like a glass being filled a few ounces at a time. I could feel the weight of the water in my chest starting to weigh me down.

    At one point, I called out to God in my mind and told Him I was tired… very tired. I could only manage to go down one more time but if I couldn’t get back to the beach, I was ready to give up the fight to live and I would allow myself to drown peacefully. My head came back above water and I was able to take one more breath before the undercurrent pulled me down again. I was ready to release my breath and my life when my big toe was able to push forward against a few grains of sand – like a feather caressing your skin. But those few grains of sand was all I needed to somehow get my head above water again and move forward. The next time I went down, I felt more sand under my feet and was able to continue to move forward, push up above the water, and so forth until I dragged us both to the beach.

    We collapsed on the beach, coughing and emptying out our lungs from the water we had breathed in. We stayed there probably for about 15 minutes or so – just sleeping on the beach as the waves kept washing over our legs.

    How many times have you felt like giving up on something in your life? Your marriage? Maybe even your life?

    Yet, just as all we need is faith the size of a mustard seed, those few grains of sand at the tip of my big toe were all I needed – all that stood between life and death for me and my girlfriend. Had I given up that day, my children would’ve never been born and neither would their children (and so on). Who knows the ripple effect it had on her life.

    Sometimes we’re so close – to life, to death, to our miracle, to nothing other than just another day – but we feel like giving up. We can’t see the reason to move forward. Maybe we’re still out there swimming. Maybe we’ve passed out from exhaustion, but don’t realize we’re already safely on the beach – God is just giving us a period of rest to rebuild our strength.

    You don’t need a lot to produce a miracle in your life. Patience, however, is the water for your seed – and that, unfortunately, does require a lot.

    But often it’s the easiest things in life that are the hardest to do.

  18. Sendy,

    WOW! That is an AWESOME praise report! Thank you God, thank you Jesus, thank you Holy Spirit!

    And your words to Sonnette, truly spirit-filled. I receive that “New Beginning” in my marriage, I grab onto it, I won’t let go no matter what – like a pit bull dog with a bone!!!

    Anyone else receive that?

    We’re not here by chance. You were ALWAYS meant to find this post, at this very point in your life, with the specific people that are on here! I was too. God brought us here for several reasons and He’s building us up – iron sharpens iron.

    Let us continue to pray for each other vigorously! In my own personal walk, I don’t see much different in my house, but when I look out the “window,” I can see a heck of a storm driven by God & His angels swirling all around the house! I know it’s just a matter of time before the windows shatter, the doors bust open, and the roof is ripped off from my situation!

    Do you feel it too? I tell you… several people praying for me have told me they’ve now come under attack, and I in turn pray for them too. The devil is getting nervous and he’s stepping up his efforts – we need to do the same IN FORCE!

    A grain of sand doesn’t do anything on it’s own. But together, they hold back the oceans!

    Is ANYTHING too hard for the Lord?!

  19. Lord, let Your axe of fire fall on the root of my marital problems and cut them to pieces, in the name and blood of Jesus Christ. If ever the fire between us dies into a suffocating smoke (or fog), I pray that You would clear the air and rekindle the flame with your life giving breath, in the name and blood of Jesus Christ!

  20. Sonnette,

    Your husband is in a sinful “fog”. These situations are so emotionally and mentally traumatic, the innocent spouse is also forced into their own kind of fog where thoughts are usually righteous, but there is a better chance for poor judgment and choices because of the circumstances. It really is a tragic situation and without God & Christs loving example, it’s extra-difficult.

    I was there, foggy and tempted while considering moving forward with a few inappropriate relationships many years ago – 10 years into my 17 year marriage. It’s ugly and I reasoned and rationalized my way into those situations with my own anger and bitterness. Thankfully I came to my senses before any real damage was done. I realized how easily I slid and fell, how imperfect I really am. I came to appreciate my learning experience and re-valued and re-ordered my priorities in life and put my wife on a pedestal. Which is probably why it’s so difficult for our sons and I right now.

    The fog – yours and his, does clear. But it takes time, patience, and some sunshine. 🙂 Please know that I’m praying for you & your husband…

    Barry

  21. Sonnette……
    I’m going to say something to you and I promise you I’m saying it in love hun…..you may be upset with me for a while but know that I do love and care about you regardless:)
    I have read every post on this site including yours and your situation and I believe that for any of us on here to progress we should all tell each other the truth no matter how hard it may be:(
    Sonnete your husband is absolutely positively no good as a husband….he is a user, abuser and a cheat…..just like my own husband was….
    I am certain that you yourself are not without guilt in the break down of your marriage and you contributed somewhat but you are clearly making a desperate effort to make wrong things right…..even what wasnt your fault.

    That your husband in light of this is still running around boldly proclaiming love for this other woman and still have the guts of have sex with you (as is his right as a husband)….while telling you he doesnt want to be with you….while playing in the church band…while having a another woman as a screen saver on his phone etc…I could go on and on…..that someone can be so heartless and cruel is not beyond me sorry to say because I’ve been there.
    Some may be tempted to say leave him and get a divorce…I too might’ve said that had I not experienced first hand almost this said thing you are now going through…BUT love is a powerful thing….
    Sonnette this man needs a change and a drastic reality check that only God himself can deliver….YOU can not change his mind or his attitudes but GOD CAN…..
    Please do not beg your husband to stay and also dont try to guilt him into staying….if he wants to leave let him leave….he knows that you love him and he knows how hard you are are trying to make your marriage work….inspite of all his indiscretions you still love him and he knows that……if inspite of all of that he still wants to go then let him go.
    Sonnette…..I dare say this maybe what he needs to get his reality check…..this might be the move God wants to bring him completely to his knees…..DO NOT give up praying for him….I honestly do not see his actions as that of just a cheating man…there is something deeper influencing (spelling)and behind this….I’m sure he was a wonderful loving caring husband before and I KNOW God can restore all of that….BUT….you have to allow Him to do his work….it will be painful my dearest but LET GO AND LET GOD…..Do not let his saying his mistress will be uncomfortable stop you from attendings those services….if she is uncomfortable then that is her business …she shouldnt be with another woman’s husband to begin with so let him and her work that out….I believe that he heard exactly what the sermon was on adultry but he is just to ashamed as he should be…
    Do whatever you can to draw closer to God…..CONTINUE to pray for him……he is not so far gone that God can not shake him up….look at my own husband and look what God did…..
    Trust God to work this out and just move out of the way..even if it is allowing him to leave…..my own up and left whether I liked it or not but where is he now….PRAISE GOD…..leave your husband to him and he is going to straighten him out….you’ll be surprised at his turn around…..
    You are incredibaly strong and I believe it is because of God that you’re able to bare all of this…..your situation is not the worse there is…..if God can raise the dead and breathe life into man…then my dearest a cheating husband that just needs a good few spiritual slaps in his backside is certainly no match for him:)))….My darling you’ve come too far to turn back….dont give up….be encouraged:)

  22. Barry,

    You’re welcomed, but thank God with your praise and bless me with your prayers! 🙂

    I know words cannot express what you’re going through, but follow His prompting and He will not let you down. He will make you MORE than a conqueror!

    I so badly wanted to tell my wife’s parents about what and who she’s involved with (since they know him and his whole family). But my spirit led me to protect my wife from that shame – it’s between me, her, and God. Everything eventually comes out into the open anyway, so that’s the leading I’m following. I’m NOT saying you were right or wrong – just sharing my walk.

    Thank you and praise God for confirming my being a blessing in your life. It really helps to build up my faith! Know I am praying for YOU and everyone else on this site fervently!

  23. Thank you, Robert!

    I with you on that – completely – and I’ll get on those specific prayers. Like you, I married for life and that is despite God’s okay for my exit. When I see & think of our sons, those feelings reaffirm what’s already in my heart because I know it’s in theirs, too. Even though she married her 4th boyfriend in a year (just 9 days after she divorced me), they’re still vocal about it.

    After 3 months, I exposed her to BF’s wife, and also to her parents as advised by Dr. James Dobson’s Love Must Be Tough. Unfortunately, I think that’s primarily why she’s so hateful towards me. Possibly not…

    Robert, you’re amazingly wise and are a solid character. Thank you for being here!!

    Sonnette, please don’t lose heart or faith. Understand that it’s a long process to commit to. There will be disappointment and false positives and false starts. RejoiceMinistries has been a solid source, too.

  24. Hey Guyz – I had an absolutely terrible night.

    Let my explain things to you – my husband has been playing at a tent meeting, bass, & helping set sound. The meeting is going on till this sun. I hear that on the 1st nit the prophet spoke on adultery, i asked my husband what he thot about the sermon? he said that he didnt listen… (dissapointing…) I havent been attending evn tho i hav wanted to but he tells me to stay away b.caus the otha women is there & its too much stress on him having us both there.
    Yesterday he took our daughter out to lunch and after questioning her it turns out they were at her place of work during her lunchtime – I told him neva to take my daughter to her again. he got upset.

    My husbands is a PK and I dont think he eva reali had a real deep relationship with Jesus, & he knows Gods word… I have been praying off & on for his salvation, he has always played in church its like 2nd nature to him. Rit now I believe i reali need to dig in with prayers 4 his salvation including our marriage & the adulterous relationship he is in rit now. The pastor whose tent meeting it is past away last year & it was his vision to have this meeting & his wife has run with it this year – apparently she is quite dynamic – I have been feeling I want to go & spk to her about wats goin on – im not sure if its just me that wants to go but i feel this urge to go spk to her… altho i knw my husband wud b upset at me for telling her wat is going on if he found out… (mayb i can tell her in confidence) i may end up going tomoro i am praying about that still. Reason being she prayed about sum1 like my husband coming to help with the meeting & she felt God sent my husband. (Mayb i can enlist her as a prayer warrior) I dont know….. (thoughts)

    Guyz last nit I was torn up by the conversation we had… He tells me he loves this other women, he is inlove with her and he wants to be with her, he feels strange when he cums home. When i told him i missed him ova the w’end he was with her he tells me he cant say the same.(hurts) He spoke along the lines of us separating… I told him I cannot accept it, I love him too much too let him go & I cant consider a life without him & that I have been compromising myself soooo much by letting him go off with this other women that I will leave him during this tent meeting but that he needs compromise with me now as well & be home next week of the 27th Feb & the Weekend of the 3/4 of March we need to go away for the weekend alone together. – he agreed to this (mayb 2 keep me quiet so he can go?) I also told him we need to go see a marriage councillor which he more or less agreed to but told me I have to get some1 he doesnt know as thru his musical ministry he knows alot of ppl. I told him i feel very uncomftorble about the fact that he is playing in church as he is involved in an adulterous relationship – he tell me that they need him & his expertise at this tent meeting – how can he turn them down?

    We ended up having sex as I have neva kept myself away from my husband as his wife in this area.This is how it always ends – with no answers. I felt so empty & lost wen we were done – felt there was no connection. I could not sleep and I did not sleep – I had so many doubts – I even had to take herbal drops to calm myself down hoping it wud make me sleep yet i stil stayed up having all these doubts & fears. Sneaked & checked my husbands cellphone & felt even more hurt by a photo of her on his wallpaper – he keeps his cellphone locked.

    I havent wanted to but thats it in a nutshell – i was so low on faith last nit. On my way to work stopped at a KFC for cuppucino – I wanted to fast only water but bcaus of no sleep needed the energy & felt beta – revived by coffee. Funny enough as soon as i got going after getting up this morning I started feeling beta & chided myself in doubting God even tho in the natural as you can see the situation is very bad. My husband wont b home again 2nit & i will be praying. Rit now I feel God wants me to press in no matter what the circumstances look like – God still wants me to trust him,believe in him, no matter what!

    Im so sori I probabli sound like such a victim – im sori i just need to offload & I hate puting my personal business on the line like this but this seems to be the onli real place where I get wisdom from Godly people who understand.

    God bless you all thank you Crystal, Robert, Sendy & others for praying for me in my time of need please continue praying for:

    1. That I find sum1 Godly for marriage councilling & my husband evn tho he has agreed to councilling goes thru with it.

    2. He comes home and sticks to his word & we can go away for that w’end together & revive our marriage & just hav a gud time together. that it wil b the start of reconcillition.

    Thank you all for being there 4 me in my time of need & so swiftly when i need you!

  25. As I say my last prayers tonight for my marriage and yours, I wanted to share a small testimony of God’s love in action.

    I went to the mall food court to eat dinner after work. I was pleasantly full only eating half the dish and didn’t feel like taking the left overs home, but the Lord prompted me to take it in case someone needed it.

    Sure enough, when I got off my train stop to go to my apartment, I saw a deaf homeless man I haven’t seen in more than 2 months! I asked him how he was doing as I shook his hand and wondered if he was hungry… he said he was indeed hungry. I then gave him my left overs and told him that God told me to take it with me so I could give it to him.

    He thanked God and asked God to bless me too.

    While I don’t think this is the case with this man, I often wonder about Hebrews 13:2. In either case, I receive his blessing upon me!

    Good night. 🙂

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