The Sin Of Adultery

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I know this next topic is going to be a very sensitive one for many in the Body of Christ. Not only are there many unbelievers who are engaging in this sin and transgression against God, but there are many Christians themselves who are violating and breaking this one specific commandment from the Lord.

With the sexual imagery that is now invading our lives from just about every media outlet, many people are battling serious problems with lust. And instead of getting their sexual needs properly met in their marriages, many people are looking outside the boundary lines of their marriages for sexual fulfillment.

As a result, you have many Christians who are out cheating behind their spouse’s back and are literally sinning and transgressing against God Almighty Himself.

I cannot even begin to count the number of Christians I have personally met throughout the course of my life who have regularly cheated on their spouses.

I have heard many of the men say that their lower half has no conscious, and if they find a pretty or willing woman, that there is no way they could ever say no or pass it up.

Others are not getting their sexual needs met or fulfilled within their marriages. Communication has shut down for different reasons, and as a result, their love life starts to get shut down right along with everything else.

As a result of not getting their sexual needs properly met, many of these men start to wander, and before they know it, they have fallen head first into a hot and torrid adulterous affair.

For those of you who really want to know what God the Father thinks about this particular sin, I will give you some very interesting verses from the Bible letting you know exactly what He thinks about this transgression and why it is so deadly in His eyes.

As with all of the rest of the commandments God has given to us through His Holy Word – these specific verses are being given to us for our own benefit and for our protection.

Many Christians I have met who are operating in this transgression on a regular and frequent basis have no real fear of the Lord or any respect for His specific commandments on this issue.

As you will see when I list out the specific verses on this topic, this is a very serious offense against the Lord, and many of His own will becoming in for some very severe judgments on this issue once they depart from this life and cross over into the Judgment Seat of Christ for their own personal judgment with the Lord for everything they have ever done or said in this life, whether it be good or whether it be bad.

Consider the following:

  • God has the sin of adultery listed as one of His special ten commandments – “Thou shall not commit adultery.”
  • God says that the sin of adultery will be one of the main sins that will keep you out of heaven. I will give you two verses below that will show you that adulterers will not be entering into the kingdom of heaven. Does this edict include Christians?Can a Christian possibly lose their salvation over this one sin by the way these verses are worded if his transgressions in this area have been deemed to be severe enough by the Lord?
  • The Bible says that God hates divorce, but that He will allow one spouse to leave the other within a marriage union if one of the spouses has been unfaithful to the other.
  • Back in the Old Testament, the sin of adultery warranted receiving the death penalty by way of stoning if one got caught in it.
  • Back in the Old Testament when God’s chosen people, the Jews, were abandoning Him and chasing after other gods – God the Father would call them “harlots and adulterers” because they would not stay true, loyal, and faithful to Him.When God calls you an “adulterer” straight to your face in your own personal relationship with Him, you are being called one of the worse things that He can possibly call you.

I personally believe that there is an “angle” on this particular sin that many Christians are not seeing or realizing. Not only are you hurting yourself, your marriage, your spouse, and your children with this deadly sin and transgression, but you are also seriously hurting and damaging your own personal relationship with the Lord Himself.

Here is the angle that many Christians who are regularly operating in this sin are not seeing:

If you cannot stay true, loyal, and faithful to your spouse, to your marriage, and to your children – then maybe God will wonder whether or not you could ever stay true, loyal, and faithful to Him for the rest of your eternal existence once you enter into heaven.

Satan and one third of the angels could not stay loyal and faithful to God for the long run, and look what happened to all of them – they all got cast out of heaven with no chance of ever being able to make it back in again.

The Jewish people back in the Old Testament could not stay true, loyal, and faithful to the Lord in all of His dealings with them, and again, look what happened to all of them as a nation and as a people near the end of the Old Testament.

God called them harlots and adulterers, pronounced judgment on them, and tells them that they will be dispersed to the four corners of the globe until the end of time where He would then bring them back to Israel and re-establish them as a nation.

I believe that marriage, and the vows and promises that go along with it, are taken very, very seriously by the Lord – and from there, He will personally watch you as to how you handle the sanctity of your marriage, how you treat your spouse and children, and if you will be tempted to stray and cheat behind your spouse’s back.

Too many people end up taking their marriages for granted after a certain period of time.

I believe marriage, and the close personal relationships that should develop between husband and wife, and between parents and their children should only be second to their own personal relationships with the Lord. It should be God, family, and friends – and in that order!

Family – with a beautiful wife or husband, and with one or more beautiful children, are the greatest blessings and treasure that God can bestow upon you in this earthly life next to Him, His Son Jesus, and His Holy Spirit.

And yet as great as this blessing and treasure really is, there are so many people who are willing to discard it, sever it, and cheat on it once they hit a few minor speed bumps in the marriage.

To those of you who are married and are either thinking about committing adultery behind your spouse’s back, or if you are already doing it – study the wording, the tone, and the straight forward messages that are coming out the verses I will list below. Study these verses very, very carefully.

Once you read these verses, you will have been properly warned by God Himself through His Word, and you will know, without any other possible interpretation, exactly what God the Father’s opinion really is on this issue.

Bottom line – if you are having any problems in your marriage, commit your life and your marriage back into God the Father’s hand, and ask Him to help heal, restore, and straighten out any thing that needs repairing.

Be guided by the Holy Spirit as to what steps you should be taking on your end to get the marriage back on solid ground with you, your spouse, and with God. Tackle your problems and issues head on, operating under God’s knowledge, guidance, and wisdom.

Jumping into any kind of an adulterous affair will only make matters worse, and eventually could lead to the complete destruction and dissolution of your marriage if your spouse ever finds out about it.

The pain you will cause your spouse and children will be extreme, traumatic, and possibly fatal and final if the transgression has been deemed to be severe enough by your spouse.

If God has completely severed His personal connection to Satan and one third of the angels due to their infidelity and rebellion against Him, and if He will allow a full marriage union to be completely broken, severed, and dissolved if one of the spouses becomes guilty of committing adultery – do not tempt the fate of your married life for a few moments of fleshly and carnal pleasure.

The gamble and the risk is simply not worth it – either for you, your spouse, or your children.

Now part 2 on the Sin of Adultery will show you very interesting verses from Scripture as what God really thinks about this specific sin and transgression and my conclusion.


187 Responses to “The Sin Of Adultery”

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  1. My name is Rachel i am 21years now with two girls but when my second born was 4months i got to know that my husband has another woman who is also pregnant soon giving birth in Feb am there wondering what to do next but am praying that God shouldn’t bless them with that child let that be the punishment these two will receive from the Lord

    • Hi Rachel…yes this a terrible situation you find yourself in…But God and not you will be the final judge…God says pray for your enemies and in that you should find some comfort…Your husband sounds like he is lost and that is punishment enough…but you must remain obedient to Gods word and you will receive everlasting life and your children will be holy through you…that’s an awesome revelation…So you must find a way to turn away from sin also…Obedience to God is the only way…This life is short but God will make it joyful for you forever…Wow…

  2. I am worried about my father. He commited adultery. I know that things have been mended between him and my mother, even though things will never be the same. What I am wondering is if he will still make it into heaven? I believe he would have confessed to the Lord and shown how sorry he was. I just want to know. I know I will never know the answer until we are in heaven but I really don’t want to see my father in hell. I love both my parents dearly. I know it was not correct to do what happened but I know that my father is very sorry for what happened. I really want to see him in heaven.

  3. Hello.
    This is a long one. Please bear with me. And, please, only comment or try to advise if you have prayed first and can answer with care because I simply cannot deal with off-the-cuff and casual remarks. (It seems like people posting here generally are caring, so that’s encouraging.) It is really hard to “put this out there” and talk about my personal life with total strangers, online or otherwise, and not something I do lightly. But obviously I do appreciate that anyone who posts here is opening up about something that is so difficult for everyone.Thanks in advance for your consideration.
    My husband’s first marriage ended in divorce; his wife was unfaithful to him numerous times. I met him a few years after his divorce, and he explained that he would have tried to forgive her and get over it and make it work, but she never apologized and it happened repeatedly. He dated a few other women before we met, and I had dated, too, but we realized we wanted to be married and spend our whole life together. We are both Catholic, and when we planned to be married, after dating for two years, we did exactly what the Church prescribes and waited to be married until after my husband obtained an annulment. I believed we were doing things right in the eyes of God and His Church, and now, more than 25 years later, in a loving marriage and with three wonderful children who are all young adults (all aged 18 and up), I am worried if the annulment was valid and therefore if our marriage is valid. What if it is not? Then I am worried if my husband could be guilty of adultery, if his first marriage truly is still valid, despite the annulment he was granted that permitted us to marry. I don’t want my husband to be condemned to hell if he is truly still married to his first wife (who has also since remarried a longtime ago) if God still sees them as married. Nor do I want to be condemned to hell for the sin of fornication. We did not totally appeal to the moral law when we dated because we did commit the sin of fornication then but repented and wanted to do things right, by God and by the Church, when we decide to get married. That’s why we knew we could not get married unless his first marriage was found not to be truly a marriage by the process of determining and declaring annulment. Now I know Scripture and Bible teaching better, indeed, better than I did two years ago or even six months ago, and because of that have had I guess what would be considered a conversion to the truth. Anyway, I had recently come to wonder if perhaps the annulment is not valid, which would make my husband’s first marriage still valid and would make us living in sin. Well, I don’t think I am overthinking this, but I surely don’t want to under-think it and be guilty of gross or willful ignorance on the matter. Anyway, I understand that in the case of adultery, God permits a man to divorce his wife (even though I think if he can forgive her and they can move forward stronger as husband and wife that’s better; but I realize that isn’t always possible, especially if the cheating party isn’t sorry and wants neither forgiveness nor reconciliation, even if the hurt party is willing to give it), but does that mean God permits him to remarry? In the Catholic faith we believe that marriage an unbreakable bond, that civil “divorce” doesn’t break the marriage bond, and that marriage is only permissible if the first “marriage” was not really and truly validly a marriage. A marriage could be deemed not really a marriage basically either because of some obvious physical lie that was hidden (for example a person was still married to another person or was not who he or she pretended to be) or a lack of intention to marry (for example, having a mental incapacity to really understand the meaning and purpose of marriage or not having the intention to fulfill the vows stated at the wedding ceremony). Without going into the controversy of whether or not one agrees with the Catholic Church on annulments, I am questioning the annulment on the basis that I think although some annulments are valid as deemed by Church Tribunals, I think it’s possible that many annulments, especially in recent decades (including the 1990s, when my husband received his annulment) might have been given too easily and may not be trustworthy. For this reason I started to doubt if the annulment is valid and whether that means God is not pleased with our marriage, if my husband is still married to his first wife as far as He is concerned. I personally want to trust my Church and believe in the validity of the annulment granted, but what if it isn’t valid and my husband is in the sin of adultery and I am in the sin of fornication? After much thought and prayer and grieving, and after a period of insisting on no marital relations until after we are more sure that the annulment is valid, I had to try to discern where we stand, as the Church itself could not provide any further clarification after all these years. We asked for documentation to help us understand “why” the annulment was granted, but they did not provide that, only the declaration of nullity, not why the marriage was declared null. Apparently the Tribunal could not retrieve archived case documentation from almost 25 years ago. We are left to ask God to help us to discern our status. My husband and I tried to live as brother and sister for a few weeks, thinking we should do that until we know for sure, and those were very hard weeks for us, a normally very affectionate couple who naturally express our love and commitment to each other in the marital act, and the inability to even hold hands or kiss was not only difficult on a physical level, but it caused us a lot of anxiety and frustration and began to separate us emotionally. In other words, we were falling apart. Not that our marriage is defined by sexual intercourse, but it is an important part of our commitment as husband and wife. Again after a lot of prayer and begging for clarity even though I got none when I sought it from the Church, I determined that we should trust the annulment. Even though I don’t know exactly on what basis the annulment was granted by the Tribunal, I think I understand the reasons that do make a so-called “marriage” void (as if it never happened due, as stated above, to some necessary element of ability or of intention being lacking), and it seems pretty straightforward that in my husband’s case, his wife did not intend to live up to her vows if she was unfaithful to him numerous times during their marriage. I had to conclude that she was not his “wife” even before he divorced her because she did not intend to be faithful to him, as indicated by her repeated offenses. It seemed that my husband and I trying to live as brother and sister was going to ruin our marriage and cause strife for our children (the oldest, age 22, does not still live at home, but we still have children, albeit young adults, at home) and there seems no justification for that. It was making us miserable and depressed and putting an instability into our family life which has always been totally solid. To try to live “apart” under the same roof began to tear apart what is a wonderful marriage. If in good conscience we believe our marriage is surely in good status, that is, truly a marriage, if indeed my husband’s first marriage was never validly a marriage for the reasons explained, we would go forward honoring our vows as we have always done. That all said, I am second guessing it and really do not want to offend God or His laws nor risk an eternity in Hell, which is why I am writing this. I long to have some confirmation from God that our marriage is good and pleasing in His eyes, and if it is not that we can not only know what we must do to please Him but be able, with His help and grace, to do whatever it is, even if it means we cannot live as husband and wife after all. Prayers needed.

    • Hi this is really hard for me I’m 36 yearsold & my husband 41 before I married him I was in a 8 year relationship never married it was with a Christian was my 2 boyfriend he was a Christian my family are Catholic but none of us in my family when to church or baptized as Catholic just did tradition but anyway my ex was a 7 Day Adventist’s Christian which I never trust them no matter how many time I went to a church I couldn’t I always had god & always believed in god jesus n the holyspirit but never understood anything well tho ex of my treated me like I was poop in the face of the earth his family to there was no reason for it but God gave me a little boy looks just like me & I did a promise to god that I will leave him if you give me a lil boy who I could love & he love me back well God gave me my miracle left him when Child was 7 month he went crazy met my husband now who raised my son at 1 yearsold I never wanted to marry yet but we did got married he was married before but by paper no love or anything just paper for $ but he got that out of the way here were it gets everything that happened he was a alcoholic drug person every type of drug he did for years he always took care of me which was weird he treated me like a queen he didn’t get drunk in bars so imagine all day drinking & my boy will not notice then he will abuse me everyday then I started doing cocaine he will wake me up & so on after 8 years of that I went threw vertigo for years back broke & hip migraines neck shoulder disk rupture I mean & do drugs & fights & so on it got so bad that I had epilepsy seizures while I sleep my husband happy working & im literally paralyzed in a bed not that I cannot walk but I had demons so many I will see portals open up but before all this god gave me another miracle child my whole pelvic broke I was bleeding for 1 year doctors were just like I don’t understand well my baby was not the same coming from his family that are real Catholic but after all this I started cheating thinking he was cheating or he is and after all this I cried to the lord calling on Jesus I couldn’t get up my life was in so much pain my shoulders were holding a spiritual cross I had leashes that will appear I had evil things sleeping with me and one day I cried to the psychiatrist counselor & said I need my beautiful big smile back please I was always alone my heart became cold hearted no feeling at all I hated my small child the first one at 12 taking care of his brother while I was dizzy in severe vertigo coughing mucus none I almost died twice while they gave me medicine in the hospital after all this god told me my daughter I’m here pray I never had a bible on my birthday 1 day praying none stop I felt jesus when I cried n cried I got save on my birthday in the name of jesus and I ask god I don’t have a Bible I will give you gift & my mom after 4 days was going in her drawer for her earring she found a pic of me 15 yearsold with jesus little Bible in it in the back my birthday she was crying n crying n crying jesus in front the book I got to know him & I was head of everything & my broken metal leg I was heal heal of all the gifts & being there for my children and now my husband is going crazy I don’t know what to do every time I get my menstral I want to cheat why did someone do a ritual on me is like I want to go cheat & I tell my husband ugly disgusting things & then I repent over n over why please I need to know what is going on I Thankyou if you could please get back I’m crying everyday

    • My dear woman: My answer will not be near so long. After almost 50 years of counseling spousal losses, I assure you, you are safe in your marriage. I do not know how the tribunal declared your husbands first marriage null and void, but it did. What they did not do was grant your husband an “an annulment”. The Roman Catholic Church ceased giving annulments about 750 years ago, when the Council of Trent declared all marriages indissoluble. Thus no wrong doing, regardless of horror, including murder, would by and of itself be grounds to dissolve the Catholic Bond of Marriage. So for a fact your husband did not get his declaration based on his former wife’s post wedding misdeeds, no matter their severity. The tribunal only looks at the propondence of evidence regarding the marriage couples apparent suitability for marriage at the time of the wedding itself. (all types of behavior, apparent and hidden, are considered a factor in their findings) Being their decision is based on the propondence of that evidence, concludes that in the majority of cases their is no single cause for their decision. Just be blest that the Church’s decision was made for nullity, and be good with that. Know that only about 1 in 60 failed Catholic marriages receive a Declaration of Nullity. Your husband was a rare case. So the Church did not error on his behalf. Remember what Jesus said when he founded his Church to be governed by earthly bound souls. What sins you retain will be retained by God, and what sins you shall forgive will be forgiving by God. The same goes for the personage of the Church Tribunal. You and He were given a gift, a gift of love by God, and three, I am sure, beautiful children. Be happy. Be a unified, and committed, Mom and Dad for the three children he gave you, and his/your grandchildren to follow. You have, he has given you, that responsibility. Get a bottle of red wine, white Zinfandel if you prefer, a bunch of candles, and the seclusion of your bedroom, and celebrate the love God has given you. To withhold it would be the greatest tragedy, the greatest betrayal, the greatest sin, and for after all he has done for you, Jesus would be left weeping. You wouldn’t want that would you ? God bless you and go forth in his love.

    • Hi my sister
      I’am a catholic as well haven read your posting it intrest me that you know the teaching of our
      faith. Then if the Holy CATHOLIC AND APOSTOLIC CHURCH throu her tribunal annul
      your husband former marriage you should save yourself from needles worry
      or don’t you believe the seat of St Peter
      God Bless You

  4. I’m not entirely sure what to really do with the situation myself and my partner have gotten in to. I had my son at 19 with the man I planned to marry but he was married to drugs and after 5 years of trying to pull him out, he succumbed to that. Then I married a man named Paul, he was a good husband but began corresponding with a girl from Germany (after having difficulties in a short while). I could not get pregnant (nothing matched up for us genetically) and I wasn’t well educated enough (by his standards). We, needless to say, divorced after a long conversation. He also didn’t believe in God but went to church with me to appease me. At that time, even after having a christian upbringing, my faith wasn’t unclear but certainly not well versed enough to know everything I wanted too. He did not want to be married to a girl who couldn’t have his kids or wasn’t attending school (he was an engineer and was embarrassed that I was a stay at home mother but still managing our farm, home, and raising my son).
    Moving to St. Louis from Kentucky, I meet my a wonderful person. I hadn’t spoke to him much but I over heard him talking about his marriage, and how his wife was disrespectful to him, wouldn’t manage a home, etc. Basically everything was wrong and it was the same from her end. They married young and dated for a long time, but agreed to marry based off of the fact that they dated that long so they should get married because that’s what was expected. I can see that, but it was never in their loving intention to be a husband and wife, but more so seemed to just have gotten married to appease their expectations from others. So (and I honestly did not have a motive) I told him as I was leaving one night from work that I had a very similar situation and if he needed some insight or advice on reconciliation to their marriage (they were a handsome couple so I thought a good look couple could always make it – wrong). So, he did ask for some advice and he took it. He really tried to salvage the marriage but everything resulted in his wife expecting more stuff, more praise, absolutely nothing was good enough or a fight was constantly ignited (seemingly) just because she didn’t even like him? Seeing them in public when they weren’t directly next to people was really quite the spectacle.. They separated and talked but never found a reason to come back to the marriage. So that’s when he asked me on a date after having multiple conversations, discussions on marriage from a religious and non-religious aspect. We covered every area to see where it could work for them. Then the date happened, and going into it, I was initially flattered but uncomfortable. I don’t know what this means for us. They had this strange agreement without any love or devotion to the other and then I basically handed myself over on a platter while he was still married. I’ve cried and fallen on my knees just in a shaking mess, lost my voice one night praying over it in front of the church in the middle of the night because it was bother me so much after work.. I know Jesus stopped the men at Mount Olive from stoning the women who had committed adultry too, I just don’t know that much to say anything else. I’m conflicted, we are getting married now and now he wants children when previously, he didn’t like the idea of having children with her because she was very cold from day one apparently. What makes us do that? Marry someone under false pretenses or notions and overlook the large signs that say ” don’t do it. it really won’t work, you’ll be sorry or miserable” and then they see that it was a terrible mistake.. I think some basic guidance would be greatly appreciated. Seeing and being with him now, I can’t imagine my life without him but I worry that our sins are enough to be a huge issue for our Christian souls and possibly our future kids. God , both full agreeing, is our first love and priority but how do we do that when we seem to have so blatantly contradicted his word?

  5. The key is to repent and not stay in the adulterous relationship. Repentance means to turn away from! You cannot have an adulterous relationship, break up a marriage and think that if they divorce you can get married and be happy together. There will be consequences because you knew it was wrong and still decided to stay in the relationship. GRACE is not a license to keep sinning!

  6. Hello my name is John and I have been a victim of an unfaitful spouse. I met my ex wife while I was in the Army and met her while stationed in Korea. She was a church goer and we both participated in Church activities and wanted to live our lives as Christ Centered couple. I notice throughout the marriage she grew distant from me and I was wondering why. When I ask her questions she doesn’t seem to answer them honestly. When I separated from the Army, she and I both lived separately due to jobs, I asked her to move to where I was and she refused. That is when she told me she committed adultery and I was devastated. After four years I found she married the man she cheated on me with and have a child with him. I was upset because she denied me to be a father and all I wanted was revenge. I know God told me to not to take revenge but it is hard because I am wondering; where is my justice?

    As for all those who confessed to committing adultery, I hope you all got to hell.

    • I’m really sorry that happened to you John what u said in the end I’m not god to judge neither u or anyone he knows we not perfect he knows we leave in a sin world & I committed adultery & I admit to my husband not once more then once but sometimes you don’t know why she did it we all do things & you can’t judge what she was feeling emotional physically or mentally that made her do that I know I did it for revenge & I’m telling you I did it for everything my husband took away my innocence he never appreciated he wanted me to be like him & u know he now fights & argue his same ways are back but when I was sick with epilepsy seizures while sleeping vertigo migraine pinkeye back broken etc… he was happy like nothing & I got saved and everyday is hell for me spitting mucus is the worst while he argue & fight and say I’m his knowing I cheated i told him with my demons or not & he don’t want to here about God or Jesus now you ask me if I should be in a marriage that a man treats me right one minute financially but not mentally physically or emotionally do you think now I should burn in Hellor keep suffering because it does feel like hell & I still get up prayer to my father in my secret bed while he watches in the door and tell me what about me forget god when god healed me with his only one begotten son Jesus to give me life again everyday try to be the good mother wife daughter friend to him doing everything right & his trying to make me sin when he was a alcoholic drug user who I was helping & then I did it he took my innocence do you think that’s right no but I forgive him over n over againI pray god heals all your ♥️John in the name of jesus.

    • You’re justice is in your forgiveness because apparently she’s moved on and you’re just killing yourself by holding on to it. If you can’t forgive ask God to forgive her for you. Plus, God won’t forgive you for sins if you don’t forgive her and Satan will have a legal right to attack you with a lot of things…. cancer is one of the things that I’ve seen the most come out of unforgiveness. It could be worse, my first husband left me and my two kids for a friend of ours and her two kids, then my second husband was abusive and got a girl pregnant, third husband left me for the neighbor while I was working and I’m married again now and didn’t even know that I wasn’t suppose to ever get remarried, so I’ve sinned just as bad as anyone else and in a marriage with people telling me that I should repent of it and get out but i can’t because he found out he has cancer, i’m Not leaving a man who is sick… so try being in this situation, i’m Going to hell now. I give up. I love God though. I don’t care I’ll just burn in hell loving God and trusting Jesus anyway. I didn’t realize that I wasn’t suppose to get married again.

  7. God clearly states in 1John n 1:9 that “God is faithful and reliable. If we confess our sins, he forgives them and cleanses us from everything we’ve done wrong“. There is no sin God cannot forgive apart from the sin of blasphemy against the Holy Spirit.

    Pro 28:13 “Whoever covers over his sins does not prosper. Whoever confesses and abandons them receives compassion“.

    Please, give your guilt and burden over to God and he will restore you. He longs to be gracious to you.

    • Forgiveness and REPENTANCE (abandons) MUST go HAND In HAND.
      WIthout ABANDONING your sin you CANNOT be forgiven. It says that in Proverbs 28:13 Confesses AND abandons, then COMPASSION.

      If you only say IM SORRY, confess, forgive me God and NOT ABANDON THAT SIN you are Like a dog that keeps returning to its vomit.

      Yes of course God forgives! BUT it MUST be accompanied by REPENTING-ABANDONING- TURNING AWAY from THAT SIN. ONLY THEN WILL GOD FORGIVE YOU.

      You CANNOT CONTINUE to LIVE in that sin and repeatedly ask to be forgiven WITHOUT turning away. God will NOT be mocked.

      God is a God of ORDER. Ask to be FORGIVEN and you MUST REPENT and stop being the dog returning to its vomit.

      God does His part FORGIVES. We do ours REPENT. THIS IS A MUST, MUST!

  8. I’m in love with a man who has been separated for 6 years and is only just started the process of divorce. He is not a Christian, I am. Am I still committing adultery in this case?

  9. I discovered my husband having a full blown relationship behind my back after 20 years and two children. I wanted to work things out but he refused and I filed for divorce. He is now married to the other woman and trying to take my children from me. I don’t understand why God is allowing this to happen as we have been in a custody battle for 3 years and everyone sided with him. I am bullied by him, and just told to ignore it. I have to see him living the high life while I’m struggling financially after being the stay at home mom during my marriage. I thought adultry was grounds for punishment so why am I the one being punished for my ex husbands actions?

    • You might feel your ex husband is “living the high life”, but vengeance is with God and he sees all and he will get you the justice. I pray all this gets settled.
      Most marriages that happened due to an unfaithful spouse usually fail so don’t worry about him. You have to take care of yourself.

    • His time is coming my darling, you are still his wife, whether he has legalised a relationship with the other woman or not, you are his wife until you die.
      Just don’t turn bitter. Let go and ask God to take you by His righteous right hand. I’ve seen God doing mighty things with me when my husband left me for young girls from our church even today he is not back. I cried, I pleaded guilty for many things that went wrong in our union before God and He has been nothing but faithful toward me and my kids. As much as we don’t like taking responsibility, you are somehow responsible for the down fall of your marriage so my advice to you would be that you cry out to God, ask Him for forgiveness for the times you have been rebellious in ways that only you would know.
      You ask why God allows bad things to happen to you, Ask Him in the secret place to strip you off of you, show you where you have been in the wrong, where you might have opened the door to the devil and fill you with Him. You will be surprised at what God will do. Lay bare before Him, hide nothing, cry, cry and cry not to people but to God, ask for His intervension. 2 Chronicle 7:14 & Matthew 6:33

      Remember that your husband has will power and if you don’t pray and stand in the gap, you are actually not giving God much to work on.

    • I know how you feel. Ex commited adultery in 2010, I found out in 2011, he left in 2012 then filed for divorce. Nothing “bad” has happened to them but me….I have lost a lot. A husband, which is a blessing because he’s a jerk, then got laid off, lost my dog to cancer, then got several pipe leaks in my house, which cost a lot, then oldest is now 18 so he immediately stopped helping with her & gives her $20 here & there & he literally makes 10 times more money than I do…. then I lost another dog 6 weeks ago…….
      I’m struggling financially also & he just seems to keep getting everything his heart desires or his mom & dad give him money & it is so frustrating! I keep asking God…..He is the one who destroyed the family so why am I being punished!? And to top it off…he’s “marrying” her today and what would have been our anniversary was 3 days ago! I let him have it & told him God is not approving of this marriage regardless if they have it in a church, etc. because….I’m still alive so in God’s eyes, we’re still marrued! Hang in there. Prayers to you.

  10. I was not faithful to my husband and had affairs with men and as a result i had a daughter, i confessed to my husband and he has forgiven me. i did this after being saved in 2015. i now feel the Spirit of the Lord is no longer in me and am having night mares, loss of appetite,not feeling well to do household chores and so forth. I went to tell my pastor about it so that he could help me but he told me that he cant because there is no space for such people like me in heaven. i’m terribly scared and need help. please can anyone out there in Christ help me. Will God forgive me? Can God give me a chance to live for him alone for the rest of my life . please help. Thanks

    • Hello Everyone,

      Thank you to those who shared their stories. I too am an adulterer. I have done extensive research on this subject and unfortunately when Jesus said it is better to poke out your eye than to be an adulterer and thrown into hell he was not joking. (See Hebrews 13:4). I firmly believe it is possible to die a spiritual death after being born again. Adultry is the equivalent of eating from the tree of good and evil (Adam and eve). God put up specific boundaries and told his followers Do NOT taste this fruit (adultry). Scripture says if the Holy Spirit leaves it is impossible to get Him back. If you think adultry is covered by grace see Jude 1 3-4.

      The emptiness and torment that we are feeling is a preview for eternity as we will be tormented in hell for the consequences of disobeying Gods word. It’s worse for us because we knew God and His commands and did it anyways. Jesus says my true followers know my commands and keep them. We can never keep them perfectly but to commit adultry is not an accident, it is planned and contrived and outward expression of the heart Jesus said. So your heart did not belong to God, your motives were selfishness.

      I’m sorry for the bad news but I am just being honest and hope this serves as a warning to anyone who is saved and has thought about having an affair. It is not hidden and the consequences are eternal. DO NOT DO IT!

      • Sue
        Yes God will forgive you!! He says repent and turn from your sin. Do this, and then live daily as you believe God is telling you that day. Get plugged in a body of Christ. Do not foresake yourself the assembly together. Iron sharpens iron! God is merciful, if we are true to repentance… he knows our hearts.

        • Amennnnn!!!!! sis Lisa Thankyou in the name of jesus May god bless all your ♥️

      • You can be forgive and restored. I am one who God has blessed forgave and restored. I repented and turned from my ways and try to live daily to please him. I know he is with me and he hears my prayers!!!
        I am blessed with a great new marriage and blessings in my life!!!

      • God can forgive any sin you just don’t do it again after he makes to whole & heals you your not God to judge we living in a age where covenant are broken routinely especially now you just have to repent right away I’m sorry but my holyspirit is telling me this happened to you in the name of Jesus god knows the heart ♥️ he knows it he knows it when he stamps that. Heart with jesus blood & his cross and to the girl who said she cheated prays are coming your way in the name of jesus god test us to see if we loose faith in him in his sin don’t loose faith sometimes we pay the price here just like Jesus Christ did on earth & one thing I know the Lord tells me don’t listen to what everyone say they will turn my children against me by one post comment or YouTube video listen to the heart ♥️ Sis that words the scripture & your father is speaking to you there in the name of jesus

    • Because of your actions, only if you live alone with no other man for the rest of your life will possibly have the ability to attain salvation. You will have to repent truly from your heart and soul and continue to repent. Another choice you have is to return to your husband and repent like crazy. The bottom line is adultery is one of the worst sins. You will live in darkness forever if you don’t find the narrow path you have left back to God.

    • Find another pastor and another church for that matter. God will have the ultimate word on who will enter heaven. If you have repented with all of your heart and you never turn back to that sin, God is willing to restore you. Study David. He was a man after God’s own heart and even he fell to the sin of adultery. David and his family suffered terrible consequences as a result but David repented and never repeated it again…and God forgave him.

    • He is not telling the truth my darling. God forgives, as long as you confess, you are truly repentant and you commit to not performing the act again. The Lord is good and He knows that we are sometimes weak and we easily fall into sin but ask Him over and over to cleanse you, He will. He has promised that those who seek Him with their whole heart will find Him. Go though 2 Chronicles 7:14 and ask God to reveal it to you. He will never leave nor forsake you, it is His promise. He cannot go back on His word, He will forgive you, in fact He has already, all you need to do is confess what you did, promise Him that with His help you will never go back there ever again. Psalm 103 especially verse 8-13

    • I was born from an affair my mom had. I understand your situation somewhat. My life was a complete struggle with God until I finally understood I had to pursue Him with my full attention. I had backslid countless times in my life after being close to God. When God showed me how I continually took advantage of Him in my life I started to realize how I wasn’t allowing God’s work and healing by my lack of commitment to Him. I realized I was wanting God on my terms. I perused His word and hunted down His truths about me and they quickly become alive in me. I think after being saved the most important lesson a Christian must learn is believing you are righteous. That Christ transferred His righteousness to YOU. Knowing this without believing it is of zero value. When you believe it you know God forgives any sin. You know God is not mad at you for anything and never will be. The belief in this righteousness provides the motivation to not sin. We can’t count on ourselves to produce a will of not sinning and have success at it. It’s impossible and leaves us feeling weak, short tempered, and distanced. Pray for understanding His righteousness and the power you have in it. Spend time studying it. You will see it quickly becomes a pillar of truth in you. The gift of righteousness is so important in our life here – it’s a powerful weapon against the enemy’s attacks that leave depressed feelings about ourselves. It brings such a freedom to our life.

  11. I’m John, I’ve created on my wife, defiled my union and feel separated from my God. He put us together and I feel I’ve ruined everything by letting my flesh rule me. I’m ashamed and fearful. I don’t want to lose my relationship with God .I don’t want to lose the presence of the Holy Spirit .Please pray for me.

    • Father! Be real right now! Father lead John to true repentance, because of his disobedience to you! Not to his wife. Just as king David had true repentance to you and it is recorded in your word that David was a man after your heart… Even he could mess up , but you are the chain breaker!! You are the God of mercy! God is looking for children with hearts for him.
      He will forgive and welcome the wayward son home, kill the fatted calf in celebration. Your job is true repentance and turn to God and never return there. You must not believe Satan’s lies, you must do battle with pray and praise. Don’t forsake the assembly of yourself to believers/church. We are here to help one another. Start today loving your wife the way Christ love the church. ( do what is for her best) Do what you know is right, be still and know that God is God. Listen to him… stop talking and be quiet in his presence. Keep doing the last thing you know you were told to do by God!!

    • I don’t know if your still suffering. God brings good out of sin. Pain causes growth. Unfortunately we tend to not listen to God’s urges of not doing this or that. We tend to do what we want and take the consequences. God allows a season of suffering to aid your free choice to His ways. Whatever God allows is perfect for you and exactly what you need to realize and change from wrong choices. God is in the business of saving souls. You need to think about what the consequences of this mess and learn and grow from them. Don’t let the enemy continue to tear you down over it. Repent, and believe in your righteousness. Keep God first and let his righteousness produce the will inside you not to sin.

  12. Hello brothers and sisters. I am seeking rest and peace because of the sin of Adultery. I am utterly devastated and so defeated. I am absolutely disappointed in myself because I know his Word. I am full of fear and dread because I know that the things done in the dark will be brought to light. I repent and ask for forgiveness and restoration but when I think about how I have offended the Holy Spirit and defiled my marriage I lose it, and get filled with despair. I have been lost before, in my life, but I never thought I would be in this place of self inflicted turmoil again. Would you please pray for me? That the Lord would have mercy and that I would be able to bare his correction? Thank you

  13. I am feeling confused, lost, guilty, and ashamed. I loved with a man for 13 years we met when we were 15 years old we grew up togeather and depended on eachother we were best friends who never wanted to be without eachother. we felt a strong relationship however we lived in the middle of a drug house we consistently delt with people who were lost and unfaithful. we both secluded yourself to the upstairs of the home . I grew tired of the environment but always loved my man deeply to stick it out until one day I noticed I was giving up and he was giving up we were fighting because I needed him to want to move with me but he felt not ready for some reason. so I ended up finding myself attracted to this man at work and he himself was married and had two kids I was never married and have no kids and I felt guilty of having feelings towards this man so I packed up and moved to my mother’s and then told my man we were not working. I then pursued this new guy and now we have been togeather for 12months and i still miss and dream about my ex and i feel like im going to loose the love of my life and i also feel like if i leave the new guy then ill just loose everything. I feel like i broke many hearts and I feel like I broke myself and my values and morals to god. I once felt close to god and now I feel confused on what path to pick. I don’t want to hurt anyone else and I don’t trust myself.

  14. My wife and I had been together for 8 years.
    I had bee unfaithful to her telling her with all my small affairs
    and I told her that I love her for understanding and forgiving me and my vices.
    I promised and promised and kept breaking it and kept doing it again.
    Finally it came to a breaking point where she told our church what was happening and that is when I finally saw how I have hurted her and decided to finally STOP what was happening. Unfortunately she also as been exhausted and she wanted space. She felt that I abused her emotionally, I used her for her convenience, and that I didn’t even put effort into winning her back. Now she wants space, lost weight and looks like she is handling the situation by looking good and something tells me she is preparing to move on. But she says she is still thinking and just wants to refresh. Chances are 50/50 she said. But whenever I see her, I feel she is drawing farther and farther away from me. I think I am going to be crazy. We have 2 kids and they’re staying over for 4 days. Within 4 days I promised not to email her and give her space. What should I do? please help.

    • You take your consequences like a man. Pray that she will be able to forgive you and seek reconciliation but know you deserve to lose her for your actions.

  15. I am a broken man. After 3 children and 16 years of marriage my wife started having an affair with a married man.

    I cried and pleaded with him to stop flirting with her as i know what his intensions was. At the end I trusted her but not him at all. I believed that it would only be an emotional affair and then she will come back to me.

    3 years later she divorced me while we still lived together. A year later I decided to move to another town as it was killing me seeing them in each other’s company.

    A year before my devorce we had another child. When she finally came clean and confessed to me it was the first night I could see the women I loved. She claims the child to be mine. She said she was a fool and wish to have a relationship with me again. She told me because she tried to hide it, but it was killing our relationship.

    She can’t stop apologising for what she have done. Not hiding anything of the 4 year affair she had. The pain caused to my children.

    I have forgiven her but it does not help for the pain. I was even fighting with God as to why… He came to me in a dream, skilled and gave me a hug. Then He said that He knows that I’m mad at Him but He knows that I still love Him.

    How do I go forward when every step I’m taking is a mission. Using medication to cope every day. Still working with the man she had an affair with. It’s been 8 months and it still hurts so much.

    • Get a DNA Test to make sure it’s yours as condition to get back together. If not yours she must give up the child for adoption or give father 100 rights and fully renounce hers in order for a remarriage. You and your ex need space from the guy to heal, seek the Lord.

      Next is to move away from the guy and even with your wife tell his wife of the affair.

  16. Hi I am a wife with a wonderful husband but I felt misunderstood, not valued or not appreciated by my husband. I think I event had a post partum depression and was always angry at him – although he isn’t perfect and had so many things he could work on – I don’t think he ever cheated – but I did it twice and I’m totally sorry and feel very bad and with the label of sin all over my mind – I love him and I have not confessed him so my failure— I am scared and I don’t want to lose my husband and destroy my sons home — I have studied the Bible and I feel more guilty now —- what should I do? Tell him ? I am not worthy of him

  17. My life is in complete chaos. I am currently separated from my wife and she wants a divorce. I feel like a shell of a man. We haven’t been intimate in almost a year’s time. She caught me looking at pornography on a number of occasions. And at some of the most inopportune times. She used to be very insecure about her body shape and when she would catch me looking at that it made her feel all the more insecure. I was heartless and shallow. She was sick and down in weight at the time. I tried to reassure her that it meant nothing to me. But she wasn’t convinced. She saw a pic that had been downloaded to my phone that I didn’t even know was on the phone and the date on the pic showed it being at a time when she was in the hospital having surgery. It crushed her. I felt like a complete ass and did not know how to comfort her. She has since distanced herself from me to the point where she did not sleep in the same bed with me and told me her husband that we were just friends. That was a first for me. I was shell-shocked to say the least and she has since stood firm on that premise. She’s been very non-affectionate with me and I have the sinking feeling that she has someone else. We have now been separated for two weeks and it is absolutely killing me. I suggested going to see the Deacon at the church to try & save our marriage. It’s the last shred of hope I am hanging on to. I know that Jesus once said if you so much as look at a woman in lustful ways you are committing a sin. I know that looking at those women in that way is wrong. I get that. But there is no physical woman involved. It’s only an image. Is that enough to end a marriage? Can I be forgiven in God’s eyes. Will this doom my fate in trying to go to heaven? I want so desperately to restore my relationship with my wife. What can I possibly do?

    • Pray mightily! I hope your wife will eventually understand that you are sorry. As a woman, I know we are easily made jealous (at least I am) and can feel insecure at the smallest things.

      I wish she would accept that it was only an image. Show her you love her. Compliment her each day and tell her she’s beautiful. Is she open to a date night? Please don’t pull away. Pray to God for her healing and strength. Also, pray and ask God to remove your desires to look at these pictures even though I know they’re just pictures (my husband does too). I hope your marriage does not end over a picture. Trust God in all things, and best of luck to you all.

    • It does not look like your relationship will be restored. Only God can do that.

      “If God has completely severed His personal connection to Satan and one third of the angels due to their infidelity and rebellion against Him, and if He will allow a full marriage union to be completely broken, severed, and dissolved if one of the spouses becomes guilty of committing adultery – do not tempt the fate of your married life for a few moments of fleshly and carnal pleasure.

      The gamble and the risk is simply not worth it – either for you, your spouse, or your children.”

      But it is not too late to restore your relationship to Jesus. Repent of your sin (turn away from your sin, even I fail to do that) and follow Jesus. Do what is right from now on out.

      If you are lucky enough, God will save your marriage. God and your wife will forgive you of Adultery, but there are consequences to your actions.

      “But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” – Matthew 5:28 (Same goes to me, because I too look at woman lustfully, which I know is not OK.)

      Repent of your sin and I must do the same thing.

    • Timothy , I want to encourage you to tell you that there is hope, only if you leave that porn. Confess to God that what you did was wrong. If you confess your sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us all our trespasses. Any literature of explicit content burn it. Then, pray for your marriage. Ask God for forgiveness, that you open the door for the enemy to come in your house to steal your wife. If you still love her and wants her back. Pray pray. There is power in prayer. If you can and knows the movie Fireproof. Get the book and do it on her. Blessings to you and everything is possible with God on your side. Never give up without a fight. Spiritual fight!!!

    • Hi Timothy,
      I’d recommend you watch the movie “Fireproof “. You’d probably find the answers there. God bless.

  18. My husband left me after 42 years of marriage for a preacher’s wife. The preacher consequently lost his job. My husband also confessed to several other affairs or one night stands. My question is this: If I cannot forgive him and her, am I destined to go to hell? I am hurt and bitter–even 5 years later. I go to counseling but it seems we go
    around and around about the same things. I need relief. I have a boyfriend who is sweet and kind; but I cannot stop loving and missing my husband because I believed he was a sincere Christian, Deacon and Sunday School teacher. He married this person and they now go to church together. I am still devastated.

    • I am so sorry you had to endure that devastation. I know it had to be heartbreaking. May God give you strength to go forward. And give it all over to Him. For He knows your heart best. Those who go against His will have to come to Him and answer for their transgression. Keep praying & stay in the Lord. My situation is not the same as yours but it’s the same sin. I’m regretting it now maybe your husband will begin to do the same. And the two of you can make up.

    • I’m so sorry for you. Your allowing the torment of this situation to consume you; at least at times, and take your focus off of God. Your comfort should always be in God before your spouse, children, or anything else. It sounds like you are still expecting some support or action from your husband that only God can give. I believe God is allowing this to open your eyes more so eventually you will be willing to seek only His hand in it, and let go of problematic perspectives. You must let go of it so God can act on it, and heal your pain. Scripture says you will receive the forgiveness that you show towards others. I have spent time remembering all the mistakes and terrible choices I’ve made in life on occasions. I think of how I have hurt so many people in my life. It doesn’t take long to realize what a horrible person I have been at times. When I know God is willing to forgive me for all I’ve done; I want to forgive others for everything ever done to me. This is something you can’t manufacture on your own. God provides this ability and changes your heart when you seek Him with your full heart.

  19. Been married for several years, my husband is a womanizer, any where we go he hits on women. Several of the women make it a habit to walk by our house and of course he is always outside watching for them. I stayed in the marriage because of our children, then went onto nursing school, but now that no children are home, I can’t stand being with him. He admits he flirts and hit on women, and he still loves me, but he just can’t or won’t stop. I need to know how to deal with this. I have drifted away from him because of his constant flirting. Is this my fault or am I making a big deal out of nothing?

  20. Is there are LAW in the bible which condones a man having multiple wives?

  21. I have a question. I have a boyfriend that is still in grief about his girlfriend cheating on Him and I just wanted to know what to do. He says he loves me and everything. I want him to stop thinking it was his fault and forgive the girl for her such hateful sins.

  22. To God Be The Glory!!! I’m Praising God for Believers who knows the Word of God, and gives scriptures for the cases in this Blog!!! It is a shame that so many have this Struggle, only because they don’t want to let Go and allow God Complete Control in their Marriages. The Struggle is because you want to Satisfy your flesh for that moment. But Trust God!!

  23. Hello brothers and sisters. I am seeking rest and peace because of the sin of Adultery. I am utterly devastated and so defeated. I am absolutely disappointed in myself because I know his Word. I am full of fear and dread because I know that the things done in the dark will be brought to light. I repent and ask for forgiveness and restoration but when I think about how I have offended the Holy Spirit and defiled my marriage I lose it, and get filled with despair. I have been lost before, in my life, but I never thought I would be in this place of self inflicted turmoil again. Would you please pray for me? That the Lord would have mercy and that I would be able to bare his correction? Thank you

    • Hi Raymond, God has already forgiven you…confess your sin and refuse to allow the devil to hold it over your head anymore. God loves you and just wants your whole heart.

  24. Dear Gary,
    Your post would condemn me to hell because I left my marriage for another man. I am a Christian, my husband was not, he had no interest in Christ and regularly used his name in a derogatory way. I prayed for many years for him, took my children to church alone, did all I was expected to do as a wife, and was very neglected over and over again. It was destroying me physically, spiritually, and emotionally. I finally left and I met a man who Loves Christ and me. Biblically I guess I would be unforgiven based on your post. I have tormented myself over this and have not forgiven myself because I feel God has not forgiven me but I have no desire to go back and I love this other person. My children love this other person as well and my son told me he thinks it’s better this way. My kids have received love and attention far greater than they get from their dad. Their dad has always done his own thing regardless of what anybody else’s needs were. So if I’m going to hell because I didn’t stay well then I just don’t understand God. I gave every effort for many many years and I can’t do it anymore. I never had affairs and was always there to fulfill my duties as a wife and then some. So I leave this post saddened and rejected by God. Pray for me.

    • I also left my marriage because of domestic violence. There is only one sin that Jesus says will not be forgiven in this world or the next, and that is blasphemy against the Holy Ghost. Our posts about what God thinks should be done prayfully and lovingly. Sin is Sin, but the unforgivable sin is as I stated. Please keep following the Lord. He did not take a beating, die for you, and rise again to watch a blog post destroy your relationship with him. God is our judge and he knows you intimately. Trust him to see you through each step in this life. If you have sinned, repent. He is faithful who has promised, even when we are not. There is no excuse for sin, but there is forgiveness and if we reject that truth, we are lost and make the cross a lie.

      • Isaiah 55:7 turn back to God so he can abundantly pardon.

  25. Good afternoon,

    Question: To writer of this article; are you saying that if one commits adultery they can not be forgiven if they repent and ask for forgiveness?

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